Locked in a three way tie for last place the Raptors and Wolves locked up in a big four-point game with the winner moving into fifth place and the loser into a tie with the loathsome Whinos. Getting on the board first were the Raptors with a goal from Mal “I can’t score if I pass???” Turner with assists going to Terry Tse and Ross Kolton. The first period ended with the Raptors up by one and the Wolves with two players bleeding from high sticks missed by the officials who decided to alter CIHL officiating policy by not letting the teams call infractions rather relying on their own eyes for judgment.

During intermission the Wolves licked their wounds and came out strong in the second frame. Rebounding with three unanswered goals and seven different players registering points, the Wolves showcased their multi-faceted attack Their goals came from Kevin Chang, Dylan Liu, and Joe Henley, with John Long adding two assists. The Wolves’ offensive outburst was complimented by strong play by Andrew Lunman who came up big with numerous glove saves keeping the Raptors’ one-dimensional offence at bay.

In the third, the Wolves added another insurance marker at the 11:39 mark with a goal from John Deng which was the hockey equivalent of the ice age sending the prehistoric raptors to the ground floor of the human tower. Two minutes later the Raptors made a vain attempt at a comeback with a goal from Paul Bray on a pass from Murray Richards but it was not to be. The Wolves shut the door on the Raptors and moved into fifth place with the victory.

In other news, Mark Paas refused to be drug tested, and may face disciplinary action as the CIHL began to enforce its new drug policy after a righteous meeting of team leaders and league execs led to the establishment of the CIHL Anti Dope Task Force Disciplinary Committee of Pseudo Lawyers and Wannabe Policemen or the CADTFCPLWP. When asked for comment, Paas nervously asked, “they’re only testing for reefer right?” After laughing at his use of the word ‘reefer’, the anonymous member of the executive revealed that the test would also include Nandrolene and Ephidrine, which are two of the many narcotics Paas was accused of using by Jose Canseco, a former friend and workout partner, in his best-selling book, “Permanent Tans, Trippin’ on Ecstasy, and Juicin’ Up!”. Afterward, Paas was overheard talking on the phone to his chemist asking how long said drugs remained in the system. “Thank God that I’ve only been taking my protein shakes with a side order of cock sandwiches for the last week!!!” he said, “on the bright side I could write a sonnet or maybe a haiku about this whole traumatic experience.” When asked his opinion on the new “no smoking dope inside the rink” policy, Paas remarked “I only tried a marijuana cigarette once and it gave me a head rush that was last week” he said, “I prefer ‘E’, it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.”

Molson 3 Stars